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Butters inadvertently reveals a deep, dark family secret about his father's late night "shopping" sprees. Alone and lost, Butters determinedly makes his way through porn theaters and gay bathhouses in an effort to get his dad back home in time to eat at Bennigan's for his parents anniversary.
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160
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In a very special episode of South Park, Cartman fights for Kenny's life when he speaks before Congress in favor of stem cell research. Meanwhile, Stan has trouble dealing with his friend's impending demise.
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Token is being picked on for being the only rich kid in town. Feeling like an outcast, Token succeeds in attracting several other wealthy people to South Park. Meanwhile, the townspeople, fearing that their little hamlet is rapidly going up the drain, attempt to run the new residents out of town.
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Garrison gets fed up with long lines, delayed flights, and the airline industry in general and invents his own transportation device. Anticipation for the new closely guarded secret contrivance has built to a frenzy. Meanwhile, Kyle's cousin, "Kyle", visits South Park from New York City. Kyle realizes he'll have to bribe Cartman not to make fun of the new kid.
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160
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Cartman manages to get Kenny's school picture plastered all over every "missing child" milk carton in the country. Cartman finds everything about his prank funny until a very strange couple turns up in South Park searching for their lost boy.
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Filled with the American Spirit, the children of South Park Elementary have all sent their dollars to the children of Afghanistan. When the boys receive a package from the kids they sent money to, personnel from every government agency descend upon the town to check the package for anthrax. As a result, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Cartman are forced to return an Afghani goat to its homeland and confront Osama Bin Laden.
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The boys get a new video game system and their plan for the foreseeable future is to play it! When the government steals their new Game Sphere, the boys will stop at nothing to get it back. Their one hope for infiltrating the top secret lab where the Game Sphere is being kept is to team up with Towelie, a genetically engineered towel who only wants to get high.
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Cartman, Kenny, Stan, and Kyle are taking Sex Ed! In the time-honored tradition, the boys are separated from the girls and schooled in the mysteries of the body by none other than Mr. Mackey. Ms. Choksondick is responsible for girls' education in the womanly arts and Mr. Garrison teaches the kindergarten class all about proper condom use.
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Cartman inherits one million dollars from his grandmother and fulfills his lifelong dream of owning his own amusement park: Cartmanland! A hemorrhoid erupts in Kyle's ass when he learns of Cartman's undeserved fortune, making him question the very existence of God and whether there's a reason to stay alive in a world where someone like Cartman is happy.
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Flatulent Canadian superstars, Terrance and Phillip, have broken up over creative differences. When the boys discover their idols have called it quits, they'll go to any length to reunite the duo and recruit them for South Park's Earth Day festivities.
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